Today’s illegal political ad, paid for by taxpayers amidst economy-crippling stagflation, features an old man slumping down a hallway, bitterly remembering his favorite things he said over the course of his failed life, not realizing how small and weak they reveal him to be.

The US government paid for a campaign ad for Trump, featuring — I am not making this up — a chorus singing “love me” repeatedly in the background.

The national debt is at record levels, the price of diesel is skyrocketing, inflation is making everyone poorer, and we’re wasting tax money running an ad for a tired old man to literally beg a country to love him.

Trump mocked over his new design for Space Force uniforms: ‘The evil bad guys from Star Wars’

I respect our servicemembers and appreciate their hard work. So please understand, Space Cadets: when we point and laugh, we’ll be laughing at your stupid uniforms, not you.

Apple Maps changes Lake Ontario to ‘Lake America’ for US users:

Apple has relabeled Lake Ontario to “Lake America” for U.S. users of its Maps app, following competitor Google days after President Donald Trump ordered a new name for the body of water amid his escalating trade war with Canada.

And just like that, I’m joining the Great MapQuest Migration.

From the text of the agreement to end Trump’s War:

9. Pending the final Deal, the Islamic Republic of Iran and the United States of America agree to maintain the status quo; the Islamic Republic of Iran will maintain the current status quo of its nuclear program, and the United States of America will not impose any new sanctions, and will not deploy any additional forces in the region.

This return to the status quo cost 7-10K killed and 50K injured and $113B to the US alone.

Please, can we stop winning now? We can’t afford any more of these stupid victories.